Today's Ramble 24.11.08

ooops I've been complained at for not writing a blog yesterday lol I didn't realise it was that popular! I thought my blog was bleeding boring rofl

Anyway, today's blog is here, I'm starting it now lol

Last night was horrible, I kept waking up not knowing where the hell I was, I kept thinking I should have been in one of the very many houses I have lived in before, was really strange, I know that I was waking up because I kept needing the toilet and I had not as full a bladder when I got up this morning as normal.

Euan was in a wonderful mood this morning, I was just doing the last button up of his shirt when I remembered that it was non-uniform day, lucky because they would have been REALLY pissed if they saw someone in non-uniform on the way to school they'd have a tantrum and insist they were not going to school unless they had no uniform. They went off to school happy though which is the main thing, no flids at all from Euan which is a big thing. :)

I went straight on lappy when they left for school and apart from my sleep I haven't been off it since :S rofl I'm so bad lol I'm so addicted to my lappy :( maybe it's a bad thing heheh, I'm sitting here on it whilst I'm watching TV with Simon and I don't think I've actually spoken to him apart from asking him for a cuppa. :S *blush*

I had a sleep this afternoon and I don't think it revived me AGAIN sometimes my daytime naps can give me a power surge but other times they make me feel worse.

Spoke to Argos today, the amount of money they will give us off the new bed that we want in replacement for the bed that we have now is dependant on which bed we want to replace it with, I guess they have a guideline pricelist of what they are allowed to deduct from an item which is why they need to know what we are looking at before they can say like "look for the inconvenience which has now occurred twice, we will give you £X amount discount off the bed you are now looking at. Was given the address for where we need to send the cheque in to pay the difference on the bed, need to dig out the paperwork again so that we can type up a draft letter to get the cheque sent in to get the bloody bed sorted, I'm sick of having one thing after another wrong with it, I fear that it would continue out of the 1 year warrantee period so we would end up with a duff bed and no way of getting money back or getting another replacement.
I have to say though that I am very much looking forward to sleeping on a REAL divan bed which has a sprung base and is very comfortable compared to the pile of shit we are sleeping on now.

Was supposed to have ordered my oxygen today but I forgot so I have to put it on the "to do" list to do tomorrow, if I don't Simon will have a go at me because he's been reminding me for days now. I'm going to ask for two cylinders because the one cylinder wasn't filled to the top when it was given us it was only just in the green which is crap because that's a good few hours of oxygen missing, just because some prat at filling level decided to move on to the next one or give up work that day when the oxygen wasn't filled up. We were offered the new concentrator and conserver combined but to be honest although I liked it and wanted to try it, Simon didn't like it and didn't like the idea of how noisy it was for the portable side of things compared to how silent apart from the breathing pfft noise the cylinder is. In the end I suppose it IS up to him as he is the one that has to carry it around as my carer as there is no bag for it so it would need to hang loosly off the wheelchair with some kind of contraption made for it, or a rucksack as there is no bag made especially for it like there is the cylinders + conservers. Also when on a cylinder with conserver it gives about roughly 6-7 hours of breathing at normal rate on it whereas this new fandangled machine would need charging after 3 hours maximum. It can be charged by a car but only one with 10V charging points, but the car is a 12V system. *rolls eyes a lot* basically it's just not a good system. When they improve it's carriability and manoeuverability (sp) and the time that it holds charge for, I might be interested.

Well I've waffled on about a load of crap tonight haven't I? rofl

My ears are not right today, with the constant mucus running down from my nose down my throat etc, it has caused my ears to be all blocked up and mucky, and I cannot hear very well, actually my hearing is shite! rofl my god are my ears itchy too EEEK really itchy I'd easily itch them with a scalple they are that itchy :S

I have had episodes the last few days where I HAVE to close my eyes, I am still conscious of what is happening but then I'm suddenly out and I'm woken up by my head dropping to one side of me or backwards or forwards, the jolt of my head wakes me up heheh. i've done that a few times in the last hour or so but I don't actually feel tired inbetween episodes.

That's it from me now I'm going to end up waffling about dreams and daydreams in a moment and I won't want to finish what I am saying.

Ni Ni.

Today's Ramble 22.11.08

Was naughty from lunchtime onwards and let Bronny and Euan on the PC and DS instead of doing their homework or occupying themselves or watching television, tomorrow I'm going to sit downstairs with them and help them to do their homework so that at last we can get back into the routine of homework every weekend, we also need to get back into the reading routine, with the novelty of lappy taking over I am neglecting the childrens' chores of a night and of course they're not complaining or they'll moan that they've not read at bedtime when it is too late anyway. I cannot record Bronny's reading as her reading diary got soaked in the flood so now she has none because the school have replaced her book but not her diary.

Euan was a little bit naughty tonight, he just constantly wanted to go on the PC, the DS is becoming mundane and boring for him and the novelty has now worn off, he'd rather play games on the PC, I can understand why the novelty of the DS has worn off, it's because I only have like 3 games that they can play, Bronny can get stuck in with the zoo but she would rather be on the PC too *rolls eyes* hopefully when they have their OWN DS's at Christmas they will play with them a long time with 200 games to get through it would take them all Christmas week to have a good look and try that many games! rofl Hopefully they are all playable and worth playing, I'm not thinking they will be duds, I'm actually meaning the actual game play of the game really.

Asked some more questions on the froggy forums about dart frogs, hoping that if there are members that use all the forums I am cross posting on that they don't get pissed off and blart out that I have asked the same question on other forums because I have been careful to ask specific questions on each forum, the more help I get from one forum that will be the forum that I choose as my base for information. Bit of a jack way to do it really but that is the way I am playing it, I know I'd be pissed if I found someone was doing that on our forum, but I'm staying unknown in these forums, so if they do get pissed off they are just pissed off with the member and not the person, they can't really attack me the person. Besides you can bet a pound to a penny that is what other people do.

Some twat is letting off fireworks again at this time of night (22:54) though I suppose it's better than the midnight they were letting them off the other week.

A few of Simon's spiders are out of their hiding places tonight, some of them are truly beautiful, a lot of them look the same to me, the untrained eye, but looking at the colourings they are GOING to be really pretty spiders, I'm guessing Simon wouldn't have bought them if he didn't think they were going to be pretty. heheh

Simon is trying to persuade himself that he wants a banana milkshake now, we have banana milkshake mix, we have milk and we have vanilla icecream so now he is off to get some. Hopefully the concoction he makes will taste nice otherwise it'll be a bit of a waste of money. *waits and sees what he says about it*

lmao he's just come up with a pint tankard with a banana milkshake with a big dollop of cornish icecream in the top. Cornish Icecream is thicker so has floated instead of melting quite quickly into the milk making a McD famous Milkshake heheh I'm sure we could name it something to match it's description. Banana float perhaps, or Cornish Banana Float heheh

What am I doing, naming a bleeding milkshake! Jebus I am getting sad in my old age lol. Speaking of old age, haven't seen rabbit John popping on the forum lately, I talk to him occasionally in pm but I don't really talk to him as much as I used to. Never mind as long as he is well that is all that matters.

I know my blogs are getting shorter, but that's it from me tonight.. cannot think of anything more to put and my imagination is on a go slow tonight so I'll leave it to sleep with the rest of my brain, just enough is awake to allow me to physically and mentally do this lol I wonder how much brain is actually active right now, would be fun to find out.

Ni ni.

Morning Ramble 22.11.08

Am listening to my Christmas music at the moment, Walking in the air by Aled Jones is on at the moment, and to think what he gets up to now, such an innocent boy lol

Had a really crap night's sleep last night, I couldn't get comfortable at all :( also my nose kept getting blocked up and I kept waking up feeling like I was bursting for the toilet but when I sat up ready to go, I didn't need to go so I had to lie back down and struggle to get to sleep again *rolls eyes*

I think I've scared my friends off from reading my blog because it's no good now I'm talking about my health in it, I try not to "moan" about things and I think I succeed, I just say it how it is without emotions, that way it's more bearable, if I'm all woe is me I would want to punch me in the face never mind anyone else (wanting to punch me, not the other way round lol)

Euan is playing on my PC, Bronny is on the DS, they've both got homework to do so we need to be getting on with it really but I don't feel well I feel like I'm in need of a sleep actually. Simon has gone out to meet the lad that is buying his exoterra cube with light their gps sent them into the middle of the back of beyond so Simon has suggested to meet at the Orbital retail park because that will come up on their gps so they can find him.

It's a bit out of place for both of them really considering they are only down the road but I guess it's better to meet somewhere where there will be a few people anyway heheh. Hopefully they are genuine people.

I'm no closer to getting these frogs than when I didn't even know I wanted them, apart from I now have the exoterra sitting on my desk, Simon should really empty it so that I can start building, but I need that substrate that goes under the cocofibre apparently whatever it is. If I must have real plants instead of fake ones then I want to get it right and I hope that they are not pants that grow like mad so that I am constantly trimming them back. Whatever I go for I HAVE to have at LEAST one flowering plant in there to make it look beautiful.

I have asked if I can just use cocofibre because I have never heard of the stuff that I have been advised to put in there first underneath a gravel tidy and then the coco fibre? Perhaps it is something that creates drainage to keep the roots from sitting in a pool of water.

Well, that's it for now :) huggles

x

Today's Ramble 21.11.08

Well I suppose I had better spare the time to write up about yesterday and then change the time so it comes up as yesterday's posting and doesn't confuse anyone.

Have you noticed that a lot of words that used to be joined up not that long ago now have to be separated? incase is now in case, anymore is now any more and there are loads of other's that I cannot remember quite now but they have been changed in recent "dictionaries" especially ones that are made for firefox and other applications, it's not as if they are wrong either every internet dictionary corrects me and even dictionary.com corrects me!

For some reason it doesn't recognise words such as wouldn't and shouldn't or doesn't - any apostrophed word all the time either, perhaps that is a bug though.

New series of the IT crowd started tonight and we missed it, fortunately channel four also have a player on the internet to repeat programmes that have been missed etc.

I notice that I'm not getting any or many comments on my blog any more, perhaps my blog has become boring and my dearest friends do not read it any more? :(

I really enjoyed our conversations with both Charlene, and Kerry and Vikki last night we had a right laugh, I think it was because I was playing around with them, they like me when I'm hyper rofl Vikki and I were singing Christmas songs and stuff lol Kezz thought we were terribly nutty lol

I don't actually know what made me so hyper it must have been the tablets rofl, it soon died down though which was sad really because I soon became boring lol I wish I was hyper all the time it would make life a hell of a lot more bearable heheh.

Well I know I've not said much tonight but I want to go to bed now so I'm going to bed now.

Ni ni.

Today's Ramble 21.11.08

Firstly OOPS, I just typed "Today" in the title and accidentally pressed enter, so until I publish this edit, I have Today as a title and a blank whatsimajig rofl

Am in the middle of singing Christmas songs with Vikki in WLM at the moment lmao how sad am I? rofl poor Vik, I've got her doing it too lol mwahahahah I will send everyone as fruit and nut loopy as me!

I am so hyper tonight, at least I was, I can feel the effect of my meds kicking in slowly it's like a curtain of mongedness falling down on me heheh

I'll finish this tomorrow, I'm already making lots of typos.

Morning 21.11.08

I'm going to give up on going to sleep I think, the only time I manage to get a couple of hours without waking up is daytime. :(

I had a really bad night's sleep again last night, I kept waking up and was in pain, or gagging on the mucus again a couple of times that I woke up I ended up having to nudge Simon because he was grinding his teeth.

I'm wondering whether I will sleep remotely better on a new bed? I'm going to call Argos later on and see what they say about the bed price because the one we have at the moment has a catalogue price of £239.99, and Argos are saying that I bought it at £209.99 so that is what price I'm getting towards a new bed, but I can't remember if I added some money towards it to get the different bed when I replaced the faulty bed this time.

Well we'll have to see, I can always work out the replacement date and see online banking and see if I did pay a little bit extra towards the new bed, I'm sure it wouldn't have gone up by £30 in a matter of 4 months if that?

Oh well, off out soon, Simon has agreed to meet someone in Tamworth and is selling her one of his exoterra tanks, that's at 12pm so we'll be going out just before 11:30am. I'm planning on dragging Simon to Matalan afterwards so that I can use my vouchers that I had last Christmas or for my birthday off Simon's parents lol

Ta ta for now.

Today's Ramble 20.11.08

Well, what a day, I'm exhausted because I've not had a sleep, really regretting it now :S I wish I'd ignored Simon and gone to sleep instead of letting him disturb me with his fiddling and faffing, instead at 2 something I got up and went on my lappy bearing in mind that I'd only gone to bed just after 1 lol so I'm really knackered and in need of bed already and I think it is going to be some time before Simon decides that it is bedtime :S

Made some more ratmix up tonight and added a handful of sultanas to treat them :) that's probably one per scoop but that's good, as long as they don't all end up in the same bowl feeding the same rat rofl

By the sound of the way they are drinking i'm going to need to change their water before I go to bed so I don't have a reoccurence of the other day when they all were pretty buggered with no water and drank for a good 5 minutes solid each when I actually gave them some water.

Just sprayed some foot deodorant in the bathroom and had to shut the bathroom door so that I do not end up killing Simon's frog with it, I can bearly breathe now I inhaled most of it and it wasn't very good I tell you it was like standing right next to a dry ice machine and inhaling that, only it doesn't taste sweet like icing sugar it tastes like bleeding soap. I'll know not to use that again in a hurry, or do tinsy winsy little squirts so that it doesn't blow so much gas and powder out instead of deodorant liquid, perhaps the powder is to deodorise, if it is I won't be using it again as it will just clog up on the feet if they are sweaty and then there is room for infection to set in bleugh (my feet get infected with the slightest of things, I have what looks like a wart/verruca (same thing?) on the tip of my big toe at the corner where skin meets nail? well, underneath that was a mass of big thick green puss last time I tried to treat it.

I have my actual appointment for that coming up on 9th December, must remember so that we actually go to it and don't miss it, I'm not cancelling this time for any reason, I postponed the last one back in October for Simon's filter delivery to come and it turned out in the end that OK we were lucky that I did but that isn't the point, I'm not missing it again this time.

I have my rheumatoid appointment too but that is with a different consultant than the one I thought I would be seeing so I'm thinking that there is a chance I am not going to get the answers that I really wanted to get... Although as long as said person believes in FM, if I have it then he will agree that I have it and then and only then can I be referred to pain management again to see if we can get me out of bed these days.

Simon seems to be really understanding or non=caring about me being in bed for the last few days, hopefully he is actually OK about it. We are off to Tamworth tomorrow for Si to meet the woman that is buying one of his tanks off him. She's coming from Nuneaton. I want to go to Matalan to spend my long awaited vouchers too, so hopefully he won't mind mooching around Matalan with me. I need a couple of new tunic style tops, some casual stuff and perhaps another pair of going out places trousers or maybe even a nice long skirt, will have to see what is on offer tomorrow.

My ratties really are attacking that water bottle, I'd say it'll definitely be empty before we go to bed so I will remember to top it up before we go, I normally check on them very last thing anyway and I would notice that my babies have no water.

Water done, time for bed now, going to have an early night tonight.

Good night blog.

x

Morning Ramble 20.11.08

What an utterly shit night's sleep, it started by waking up at 3am this morning ,bearing in mind I'd only gone to sleep at 1am ish was the last time I looked at the clock, I woke up in absolute agony, real agony, crying pain because I had obviously spent the last 2 hours in the same position which is not good for me, I had sore points all over, my right hand side was all painfully numb and I was just a bag of shit, I also had a bad head from sleeping with a crick in my neck.. because of this and not being able to get comfortable on my left side, I lay on my back, and no word of a lie - the millisecond I decided to do that I had a stream of mucus running down from my nasal area down into my stomach from then on, and I had indigestion from the apple juice and apple eaten before bed (one of my stupidest moves yet) and I was just shitty shit shit, I couldn't get to sleep, I kept gagging on the snot but unless I cleared my throat and hoiked it up every five minutes, I had no choice but to lie quietly and swallow (mucus is STILL flowing freely even now!) so, lying awake, headache from a cricked neck, gagging on mucus as long as me arm, and not having fun at all since 3am this morning, I should have given up and got up, at least every time the apple repeated it wouldn't have been able to wash it's acid up into my throat if I was sitting up. Not sure whether Simon would be too impressed with me going on the laptop at 3am though, to be honest I'm wondering why I ever bothered going to bed at all. To this effect I have immediately, upon coming back upstairs from sending kids off to school, changed my pillows back to the 30 year old feather monsters instead of trying the new fandangled hollowfibre shit that feels like I'm not lying on a pillow yet manages to give me a crick in the neck and make me sweat a great deal. Bronny can have one and the other be left for spare.

I thought that this morning was going to be hell, Euan was being constantly riled by Bronny, constantly beating her up, mouthing off at me, having a go at me, I thought yep, another morning that Simon takes Bronny and I have to bed and plead til my face bleeds for him to go back again and take Euan... but come time for getting off to school he was absolutely golden, put his coat and gloves on put his PE kit on his back and carried his book bag and went off on his way.... needless to say it was Bronny that was having the pissy fits this morning and she ended up starting to cry about the way everyone is always horrible to her at school, usually this breaks my heart and I cry with her but I'm afraid it received a very cold, "oh whatever Bronny" this morning *blush* well, I ask you, every blinkin day she's moaning she wants to move schools etc etc.. I keep telling her every single school she's been to so far has been the same. Problem is that all the other children have been to camp together and made bonds, all the other children have been at the school since they started school so they've built bridges and made good friends, Bronny is still relatively a newbie so she's got a lot to live up to.

Anyway, here I am now, on the precious lappy when I really should be catching up on sleep from this morning, but I don't want to waste the day, although if this headache, which I've not medicated myself for yet, gets any worse I will go to bed. To sleep, as I'm propped up in bed as I type this ;)

xx

Today's Ramble 19.11.08

Simon's parents are asking the impossible on the bed, they want us to complain and try and get a more expensive price out of them for the bed that is now more expensive but we cannot do that, I know that we'll not be able to do it, I think that if he wants a higher price bartering he should do it himself to be honest but I don't think that I'm going to get anywhere because they won't put me through to the customer services manager for a start. *rolls eyes*

I will have to talk to Simon about it tomorrow because I paid £209.99 at the time there's no good me arguing about getting the higher price that it is today as a credit note, because 1 they don't do credit notes for damaged items, though they will replace the bed with the same bed which happens to be at the new price of £239.99 so Simon's Dad is trying to get me to barter them to allow me that price of a new bed, I can see where he's coming from but firstly trying to get through to a customer service manager is impossible and then when we do get through to him we have the problem that I have to be strong enough to argue what I want without the customer service manager telling me to fook off.

Geesh this laptop is running hot tonight, it's really making me overheat, though saying that it has been running since about 6pm :S poor thing getting battered by me like that rofl

Have managed to transfer everything apart from the music over to the new lappy, I'll do the music tomorrow I just couldn't be arsed today.. don't think I'm going to be able to transfer the videos as I think they might all be too big will have to have a look, only have a 2gig flash drive which I thought was enough but merely my documents took up 31 gig of space, that was fun, transferring it across 16 times to get it all :S rofl it took me forever!
my pictures took me forever too, I've not looked how many files I have in there

Health wise been in a LOT of pain today, my feeties have hurted from walking on them and my bones in my legs feel bruised, I have been stuck in bed for most of today thank god I have a laptop now. I'm just thinking it's a goodjob that I upgraded to a usb mouse because this lappy hasn't got a slot for a ps/2 mouse heheh.

Simon is looking at buying an ethernet printer for us to use, it will be an all in one printer scanner copier and even a fax machine, fax is good there have been times when we've had to fax something through and we've not had the facility to do so, now we will have. Will save on postage if it is something we can just whack on a fax

Simon posted his millipedes out today, cost him a bit of money but I guess it was worth it, he has been paid by paypal and they're off on their way to their nnew home, I can't get over how different it is in the none furry world, no one bats an eyelid when you rehome something in the none furry world, it's normal to swap and change what you want to do, all his mantids have gone off to their new homes too, I can't believe Simon has let everything go for such a cheap price though, I think he's mad. He's impatient though, once he wants something done it has to be done there and then, he won't wait months to get the right price for each millipede and earn over £200 he'd rather get them gone at a lower price which was DE|FINITELY Less than £100
Virginia sells her pedes out at £10 a throw with £8 postage, that's £18 for one millipede, that is bloody expensive, Simon could have cut in and sold them at a cheaper rate and still managed to make a decent price on each one, for all he knows he could have sold them to a person that has no intentions of keeping them but merely to sell them on for a lot more than he sold them for.

Rabbits were hungry today, Simon fed them this morning and they practically threw themselves at him with pitchforks to get the food, and they were still munching a good hour later. They get two bowls of food to last them 2 days which is more than enough because the bowl is full to overflowing, maybe they should be getting a little more while the colder months are upon us though, I might find another food bowl to be filled up for them til it warms up again, don't want them getting FAT though.

Hammies are getting on abit now, gotta start preparing myself for the dreaded you know what, although they might live longer than average, saying that what am I talking about they are only 1 year old rofl, how long do they live for anyway I cannot remember.

ffs I swear I just saw something move in the shadows over the other end of the room on Simon's desk, it wasn't anything really small either, the locusts didn't get freaked out though so either it wasn't visible to them or I imagined it, I am hallucinating a lot lately, visual AND audio hallucinations :S I think the audible ones are worse though because I honestly think I hear the think but it's not possible, like a ting of a dainty bell at gone midnight and things like that.

Right that's me done, going to have a game of mahjonng then I'm off to bed peoples.

NI NI

xxxx

beds beds beds

You guessed it, we need a new bed again, bought the new bed in May, replaced the knackered bed in July and now it's buggered again and we need to replace it. The mattress is absolutely fucked and the draws on the base are knackered too :( stupid bed, stupid stupid.

We're hoping to get a sprung bed, one with springs and upholstery on the bottom part of the divan and a memory foam mattress on top, unfortunately our bed was less money than we thought it was so we don't know whether we have the funding for it :( probably not :( which means we're stuck in having yet another cheap shit bed that will undoubtedly break again. *rolls eyes*

Why do beds have to be so expensive? To get the bed we actually want we're probably looking at £500odd :( stupid stupid.

:( *sulks*

Today's Ramble 18.11.08

What a wonderful day today has been!

Lappy arrived today :D woot. I've been on it for ages, first I went on it when it arrived but then I got tired so had to put it down, I wanted to play on it all day but I knew that it was going to be a mistake if I did that so I behaved.

I've been on it practically since the kids got home from school this evening, they of course went straight on the pc and DS, it's becoming too much of a norm I think I'm going to have problems when they can't go on them :S

Though in a month's time + 1 week they'll be playing on their own DS's and not wanting to use the PC (hopefully) lol so it'll be pretty much redundant unless I go on it to do a gimp image or something that I cannot do on here, though saying that I'd be able to just put a mouse on here should I decide that I prefer to use the laptop over the PC.

Health wise the laptop will do me good because I'll be able to keep my legs raised instead of them hurting because they're in the down position, I exercise a little bit by moving my legs every now and again to stop them going stiff, but at the pc desk I struggle with position I can never get to sit straight and look at the monitors face on so I'm always in an uncomfortable position.

Euan was well behaved tonight and actually agreed to come off the pc and go to bed at bedtime I nearly had a turn he was being that good about it, only trouble was after I'd settled him in bed was that I'd left the door open and left the landing light on for him as he was scared and had been thinking of scary things which obviously cause tension and upset before bed which also leads way to bad dreams. Simon closed his door and switched the light off and Euan swiftly became rather hysterical especially as he knew that I was going downstairs and not staying upstairs. I had to calm him down, leave his door open but agree to come back upstairs shortly which I did but he was asleep poor little man he got really worked up about it bless him.

Cockroaches are being ever noisy, it's actually quite freaky listening to them moving around, scurrying lil horrible creatures that they are, I hope that his spider that is still eating them hurries up and eats them to get rid of the bleeding things.

Hamsters better not keep me awake tonight lil craps rofl, my pet name for them is called Pompoms because they look like the little pompoms you see on the end of tassles for a furry coat or something or tied onto laces on eskimo boots rofl. Incidentally, High School Musical slippers have pompoms on them too.

I'm blank for bloggin tonight so that's all you get out of me i'm afraid :P

Nite nite

Afternoon Ramble 18.11.08

Well lappy arrived today with plenty of time to have a play on it before I went to bed :) I'm loving it, actually being able to do something whilst the kids have my other items of electrical fun and no I'm not talking vibrating either lmao *what?!*

Euan was naughty this morning on the way to school, he was a little way behind Simon and was shouting at Simon and basically showing off with the girl that he was walking to school with. He had a time out in his bedroom for that, Simon does not like being made to look a fool by anyone so Euan was punished, I would have told him off in front of his friend thus embarrassing him personally, but whatever, it's Simon's choice how he does things.

I still have to install various other pieces of software, I haven't installed office for a start (open office) and I have to install a dictionary for this laptop for firefox and I cannot remember how the heck to do it.

*goes off to fidget with bits.*

Good Morning 18.11.08

Up earlier this morning so I'm downstairs by 8am just in case I am first on the list his morning, chance would be a fine thing but you can always hope :S heheh will get the kids downstairs in a minute and sort them with breakfast, have just asked Simon to get the children up out of bed and down for breakfast.

Typical, on a weekend morning the kids will be up earlier than the birds but on a school morning they have to be woken up *rolls eyes* I long for the day when they are up late at weekends and I'm complaining at them to get their asses out of bed, I actually long for the day when they are old enough to be trusted to get up and go downstairs and make their own breakfast and stuff like that. I love them to bits but I'd love them to be partially independant too rofl

This waiting game is horrible, I WANT MY LAPPY NOW! rofl though I've waited an absolute decade for a laptop (slight exaggeration there) and I am sure that I can wait for a few hours longer. lol I have wanted a laptop ever since laptops came out! ;)

Right, now to start getting ready upstairs on the pc, getting bookmarks stored and stuff ready to just get sorted on the lappy. Laters gaters.

Today's Ramble 17.11.08

What a balls up last night! I typed my usual nightly essay up on here, the DS an although I knew I was nodding off I didn't bother saving the essay, I then jolted up sometime around 1-2am and looked at the screen and there was a few vvvbbcbb on it where it looked as though someone had crawled across the bottom of the keyboard so I must have managed to select the whole text and put those few leters there instead. To say I was pissed off would be an understatement, however I bit my cheek and closed down and went to sleep. No point starting again as when I went to the loo before closing down I was falling asleep standing up never mind when snuggled back down nicely in bed lol

Today has been strange I've been REALLY poorly but in exceptionally high spirits because tomorrow is receiving of laptop day :) WOOHOO lol I'm so stupidly excited but then if you saw me struggling to sit at the PC you would understand. If you saw me upset and sad because I can't communicate with my friends you would too. It also means that I can sit and watch TV when Si is watching and still be able to log in and do stuff :)

Of course if I had a life none of this would bother me, I'd be out working and having a great time with my family when I'm not working.

Euan was naughty at school again and in Choir practice he got kicked out too. This is VERY VERY unike Euan to be naughty at school he is normally golden boy. I am going to get him back in at the doctors because this behaviour has only been really bad every day, opposed to once a week, since he had that nasty bump to his head :( I know of someone who had an unchecked head injury and their personality greatly changed and after various doctors and hospital appointments it turned out he'd had a bleed on the brain which they had to sort as it was causing pressure on the brain incidentally he died about a month later, never knew if the stories were true or what he actually died of either, saying that the bit about the personality was true.... *thinks*

I'll be so relieved when Simon has got rid of the noisy cockroaches and starts feeding locusts again, I wouldn't be remotely perturbed to find a stray locust like I'd be scared to find a stray cockroach, I'd scream the house down if I found a cockroach in the bed for instance. *shudders at the thought*

I would probably feed the fwoggies pinheads actually and woodlice and springtails are on the list too although looking at Simon's issues with springtail explosions (population) I won't bother with them I'll probably find a way of storing and feeding pinnies to them

Fwog will be fed locusts :) that is if he gives her up to me :D although I don't think there will be space for Fwog as well, though, if I gave up one of my monitors..... lol when I'm used to working with the laptop screen, I will probably more willing to give up one monitor to just have one then I will be able to fit more creatures on my desk lol (I'm getting as bad as Simon!)

hmm what does a tropical setup look like? heheh *will have to look at pictures of set ups to give me some ideas, I have some ideas in mind but will have to think, an absolutely ideal set up would be with a waterfall and either pump or reservoir in it that I would fill up now and again therefore giving a constant flow but then again how would I remove water from the bottom without a pump on a continuous flow.? HA I'm so stupid rofl nice ideas in my head though just shame I can't put them into practice would like to have a shallow water dish as well as a pond like area so that they have somewhere to lay spawn should they actually have any not quite sure what I would need to do if they actually bred though heheh

I'm really excited about getting my bumblebees though as you can most probably tell, need to find out from Simon if eco-earth is coconut fibre or not as that's what we're used to well Simon is not me :) the set up has to be absolutely perfect and maintain a steady 80% humidity before I even order the fwoggies.

I could have typed this 3 times already, in the time it has taken to type what I have now, on the laptop *rolls eyes* tonight is the last sleep heheh, this time tomorrow I'll be shutting up shop and going to bed as I'd have already typed my daily ramble. heheh

I'm off now as fallin asleep and, as I nag the kids when they are excited about something.. The sooner I go to sleep the sooner I'll be waking up for morning :D lol

Ni ni

Ramble 16.11.08

This is not here because I fell asleep after typing a whole blog last night and my DS battery died and shut down so it didn't save. At least my laptop arrives tomorrow though which means no more losing blogs because I'm a willy wonka rofl

Sorry.

Today's Ramble 15.11.08

Why oh why?

MSN/WLM whatever they want to call it these days causes me nothing but problems, I'm always pissing SOMEONE off, I wish I never installed the bloody thing, especially the stupid new beta version that doesn't work properly.
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I have received a massive bollocking off Simon tonight, for spending £20 on my secret santa, he is angry that have spent that much on my SS when they are just someone online when I could have spent £20 on my parents. It's always a waste of money when it's not for him though!

Christmas shopping is going to be soooo much fun this year, especially as I can't control the trolley as well as myself.

Ffs it is 00:14 and someone is letting off a whole bunch of fireworks! Are they insane?! Trouble is if you phoned the police to complain the police would say that noise pollution isn't in their jurisdiction any more, phone the council and obviously the council is a 9-5 place *rolls eyes* which basically boils down to "shut up and put up it's nowt to do wiv us" there is no justice these days, no justice at all.

----------------
Speaking of no justice, in the Baby P case the first report stated that the biological Dad saw him often, how come he didn't notice the weightloss and the injuries, surely he would have witnessed SOMETHING?!
--------------------

I'm looking at getting a couple of dart frogs to live in the taller one of the exo-terras that Simon has up for grabs, I have tonight joined the reptile forums to ask advice and information on them according to Simon I posted completely in the wrong place and will get far more replies and therefore advice that's needed

ni ni

Today's Ramble 14.11.08

Oh buggers has today been a sod, I've been in pain a lot and Euan had a day at school where his teacher said he had been "horrendously behaved" which is very very bad for him, normally he's a little sweetheart at school. Looks like it's getting far worse, we've had bad behaviour EVERY night this week with putting him to bed, perhaps it's building up to something, it took me a whole hour to put him to bed tonight after him threatening me, throwing things at me, swearing at me, shouting constantly, even Simon threatening he'd smack his bum didn't work (because he knows he wouldn't *rolls eyes*) I'm at the end of my tether with him now, nothing worked, even me trying to calm him down didn't work he just kept getting all angry again and ignoring him made him even angrier and he started trying to attack Bronny, poor Bronny was almost in tears because of him. She gets scared of him and she worries about what he's doing to me, she panics that he'll kill me, not with hitting me but by making me all worked up she thinks he'll kill me one of these days, I keep telling her that won't happen but she doesn't believe me, she just gets upset to the point of tears and often in tears when he "flids"

Today has been a day which has gone really slow, I want it to be Tuesday NOW lol I want my laptop here right now lol I can't understand why they are going to take so long to deliver it, from yesterday when it said with courier, til Tuesday, I guess that's a 48 hour delivery excluding the weekend, pretty crap really but I guess it depends what Dell have paid for the delivery. Another annoying thing is that they have now knocked another £20 off my laptop and a free colour upgrade (casing) is on offer on the laptop I have chosen, why couldn't they have done that 2 weeks ago? grrrrr?! rofl

*stops complaining*

Simon is struggling to get the Ubuntu live CD to work with his PC a the minute because he wants to show it to his Dad and persuade his Dad to go for it to keep him protected from viruses as he is quite often falling for scams in fake emails and ending up installing a virus *rolls eyes* I'm just glad that my Dad isn't as daft.

Mum is apparently flying back from Germany this weekend, not that it makes a difference as we'll probably not see her until Christmas anyway *rolls eyes*

I just thought, no-one has asked me what to buy the children for Christmas yet, so I presume they are just getting whatever they think is suitable. They're not going to be overly bothered with lots of toys anyway because they'll be playing with their DS's until the novelty wears off and they're fed up of them.

I am going to get them a watch each, one that Bron will actually bother to wear! I'll probably get them an accessory set for their DS's like I have with the spare styluses and the carry case and stuff and the game storage containers, that and various other gifts :) lol I just looked at the price of beds in Tesco catalogue and I'm not going to be able to get them a new bed each for Christmas :( though Bronny only needs a new mattress, it's Euan who needs storage and will do as he is getting older, though we're looking at £3-400 to get a decent hi sleeper and then he will have to quickly grow out of attention at bedtime as there is no way I'd be able to get up to give a kiss and cuddle, in fact how on earth would I change the sheets?! lol

I spoke to Angel via email today because I wanted to order a couple of soapies from her as I'm down to my last one from my stock of Angel soapies I have ordered 2 baked apple and 3 carrot and orange cake and 1 mango :) mmmmmmmm they will last me a good while, indeedy they will :D

I am trying to remember whether I dreamed going round to Julie's house and sitting in the conservatory or whether I actually did go round and sit in her conservatory lol because i cannot remember in the slightest whether I went there or not. Julie being my neighbour back at Brooklyn Road. I often imagine what life would be like now if we'd stayed in that house whether we'd still be able to afford the mortgage or whether the house would have been reposessed, most probably the latter so we'd probably be where we are now only financially worse off.

Am off now ni ni x

Today's Ramble 13.11.08

Our mattress is broken! There's a nasty spring sticking up out of it I actually stubbed my toe on it, it sticks out that much! AND there's AT LEAST hole in the spring structure right by where my feet go when I sleep on my back! it's well and truly knackered and we've only had it for months not years! I've never known such a crap bed and mattress, seriously it's wank! scuse my language! rofl will have to phone Argos tomorrow and request a replacement as it is still under warranty thankfully. Stupid crap bed! With the problems we have had I'm wondering if it is probably worth our while to get the extended warranty for the bed at least we'd be covered should something else go wrong :S I wish we could have had a decent decent bed on credit, though we'd still be paying for it now.

My dream bed would be an adjustamatic but Simon reckons that it would be too big for the bedroom.. who said anything about getting a double bed? lmao

Simon made me come to bed at 11pm and he is still pissing about even now! *rolls eyes* he's atrocious. He keeps calling me a lesbian just because I keep farting! Straight people have gas too! lol

Euan had more than one flid today but thankfully he had a short one this morning but I still managed to get him off to school, the worst one was getting him to bed though, I could tell it was coming because he pissed around in the bathroom whilst cleaning his teeth, thus getting even more toothpaste on the carpetted floor in the bathroom. Then he went stupid and majorly hyper and being really rough with me and hurting me, he turned nasty when I accidentally hurt his leg when I was trying to get him back into bed he screamed "I hate you" and that was when he started screaming, hitting me, throwing things at me and generally being awful I left him to it as he was still shouting crap at me and I went in to see Bronny to give her her 30 minutes attention and about 15 minutes into Euan came out and said he was sorry I told him I'd settle him down when Bronny's attention had finished, all in all I came into our bedroom at 20:44 which means it took 1 hour and 15 minutes to get them to bed, a new record :( If I JUST put them to bed then I wonder how long it would take ?

Anyway, Ni ni from me lol

Today's Ramble 12.11.08

Another poorly day for me today, so bloody painful a couple of times I have felt really sick from the pain, when I broke my ankle, when I was in labour with Bronny I've not felt so much pain as I have been feeling of late. I am hoping on all hopes that this is a bad flare and not now the norm. I will try a bath tomorrow and see if that helps in the slightest, although bathing quite often gets me all hot and bothered so that I feel worse, I wonder if Si will clean it for me before I have a bath lol otherwise I will be cleaning it and then needing to go to bed lol

I'm definitely missing Charlene lately, maybe she has fallen out with me, perhaps it's just because I have not been on as often, I don't know I just hope that she is OK and that she's not too stressed out bless her. It's not fair that she has to go through so much stress on a daily basis.

Have said a few silent words on behalf of poor Baby "P" today, what a sad and painful existence he had, those Social Workers that failed him and condemned him to death by giving him back to the BITCH of a Mother when it was blatantly obvious that something was a miss most especially after the case of Victoria Climbie bless her little soul RIP which they were also responsible for heads should roll for this, there is no way that they should be allowed to still continue watching over children that are at risk, the Supervisor responsible for authorising the return of Baby P to his Mother should also lose her job. ANY Official body that was involved in the case should lose their jobs and the ones in the thick of it should have a question of was it neglect hanging over their heads. Now most seriously as a Mother, a Mum/Mummy (Mum to Bron, Mummy to Euan) I cannot percieve in the slightest how the hell that bitch could have obviously chosen to care for the needs of her sadistic boyfriend over her own doting Son, someone who 100% relied on her to love, honour and protect him, how could she stand by and watch him being slowly tortured to death? Now, I love Simon with my heart, mind, body and soul, I would even die for him. BUT if he layed one finger on either of my children, in ANY way that was inappropriate, he would be out that door so quick that he wouldn't have time to pack a bag, I would NEVER cover for him. EVER So this is why I am soooo confused as to HOW OR WHY that bitch could cover such dreadful injuries up? I am so cross and I know I'm not going to be the only parent that would like to get their hands on any of the trio of barstewards and give them some of my own justice for little baby "P"

Rest in Peace little man, he can't touch you now, you are safe and the angels will look after you and play with you now "Daddy's Little Soldier" that you were.

"Amen"

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Well, not sure what to say now, so much emotion right now, sorrow, anger, disappointment.. happiness (that I know that my babies are safe) guilt (that I'm happy), dread (that there's more little children out there being severely abused by someone they look up to and they are "slipping through the net of the system" because of decisions that people (who are paid a fair whack to do what they do) are making)

*Sigh*

_____________________

I confided in someone something I've not told others today and I no longer feel alone as they have the same thing too. Feeling very relieved now. Not going to say any more as nothing more needs saying.

My Kave and corner house came today woot I'm going to add the corner house tomorrow. :D

I'm thinking of transferring my blog to googlespaces or whatever it is called, the only problem with that is I don't know whether or not I can hide it away from general public, if I can't do that then there is no point in changing over

Well I'm done now, tis 3am and I keep fallin sleep.

ni ni

Today's Ramble 11.11.08

What a day I am having :( Putting kids to bed took me an hour as usual, but it's supposed to be 7-8 not 7.30-8.30, my fault for forgetting that I get Euan in bed for 7pm to have his 30 minutes of attention not 7.30pm, normally when he's in bed late and demanding attention I take the time away from Bronny but tonight I allowed her the full 30 minutes because I felt it was unfair to take her time AWAY again, shame she was more interested in playing Brain Training on my DS she doesn't like more brain training, she only likes version 1 lol

Simon is doing my head in at the moment, he's trying to make me laugh and I don't want to laugh which is really annoying me because he is reminding me of really funny things that have happened to me or him in the time we have been together and now I'm really narked because he succeeded and made me laugh, he used the most hilarious but humiliating of me, memory we have, I won't bother typing it up now I'll just say Tesco supermarket in Stafford and the day I had a stomach bug. *sniggers*

I checked my order status online with Dell and the laptop is in production stage :) woot! closer still! At least on days like today I would have still been able to talk to my online friends because I was in bed because it was too painful to move not because I needed to sleep. I miss everyone a lot when I'm not online and I am especially missing talking to Charlene on msn, we normally have a right laugh.

Euan has been especially naughty today, he had a flid and hurt Bronny this morning which got him threatened with bed when he gets home and then when he came out of school Simon told him off for wearing trainers, then Euan complained that he couldn't carry everything Simon told him to put it all in his bag and he threw it all on th floor and then himself or something along those lines, of course when I calmly ask Euan what happened I got a completely different story. I obviously believe Simon anyway especially as otherwise Bronny would have piped up with "no it/he didn't"

One of the problems is that when irked already, Simon and Euan rile each other further so Euan ends up in a flid, sulking or crying and Simon is pissed off. The biggest problem in my eyes is that 1. Euan gets irked by the slightest of things. and 2. Simon threatens "Bedroom!" for the slightest of things.

My ideal world pennies in a jar and timed time-out on the stairs failed before it even took off. The pennies scheme worked but time out didn't even take off properly, my fault entirely but there we go.

Bronny talked to Jane tonight on msn I would have set her up talking to a few people but I was worried that she'd get confused and Bronny especially likes Jane as there is only 5 (1/2?) years difference between them and she's heard me talk about Jane lots & lots or seen me talking to Jane for the longest. Maybe next time I'll set her up to talk with Kezz and/or Vik, if they don't mind of course heh :)

Arrrggghhhh I just had one of those damn travelling itches but over my scalp eeek I hate them! I may aswell confess that I have caught headlice from Bronny again. To be brutally honest against myself, I don't think we have ever truthfully completely eradicated them so when one of us gets clear the other infects her again. I am going to buy some prioderm as that is the stuff that kills eggs as well and Bronny's headlice problem was eradicated with it, whereas everything else we've used the damn things have been immune to it. We're going to zap both of our heads at the same time so there's no prisoners or survivors left alive! Then every time Bronny comes home from school I'm going to run the electronic detector comb over her head to ensure there are no new visitors in the household.

What I should to is cover our heads with that ecg gel (Electronic Conduction Gel) and zap us with the maximum electricity we can survive and kill the fookers all in one go! heheh if only it were as simple as that sounds *rolls eyes* you never know, electrocution may even cure me! rofl you know what they say "kill or cure" rofl ;)

Starting to drift off to sleep now and don't wanna lose all of this so am going to stop now and Publish the post to Bloggy.

Afternoon 11.11.08

Ow times a thousand, I'm in so much pain, I really am, in bed still, poor Bronny was so worried bless her, she asked Simon how come I was still in bed and Simon told her it's because I am poorlier than ever *rolls eyes at Simon for his fantastic tactfulness!* I have told her I'm just in a world of pain and not to worry in the slightest. She is now on my PC typing in the school blog lol

Euan has befriended me after an hour of shouting that he hates me, that he's broken up with me and he's going to make himself be dead so he doesn't have to see me any more. *sob* so much anger and hatred it's awful.

A very good friend suggested that Euan may have autism as there are many different levels and she's thinking this because of his behaviour, she thinks that it is from not being able to communicate his feelings and emotions so very much like a toddler he has a tantrum. He is warming up to another one now. :S

See you later.

Morning 11.11.08

Mornin all, I thought yesterday was bad, Lordy knows what I thinks about today *sigh* [note to readers, I've decided to yak about health again as it is my blog after all]

I.ve just fallen asleep again and Simon told me off, so I'm going to sign out, maybe I will get some nice deep sleep for once? ha ha we'll see.

Love to all.

xXx

Today's Ramble 10.11.08

Bleugh.

Today has been a really bad day indeed with regard to pain and spasms, REALLY bad, and really tiring too, everything has just been such a trial just walking around the house... bleugh.

I think I'm going to go to bed and continue writing this as I really do feel like shit.

Today's Ramble 09.11.08

I have been whining since Friday about how long it is going to take Dell to deliver my laptop, Jane my trusty companion put things into perspective yesterday by calmly mentioning the fact that it won't hurt to wait a little while longer and she is totally right. I first started wanting a laptop back in February 2006, not long after we moved into Gnosall, that was 2 years and 9 months away 33 months ago, I am sure that it is not going to hurt to wait another few weeks heheh Thanks Jane XD lol I just tried to look like that smiley and must have looked like a right demented old git.

That has just reminded me about what Bronny has been lovingly saying about me for a while now. Whilst we're cuddled up together in her room she will look at me, straighten out a few loose hairs and then say, "mummy you really do need a makeover" she couldn't be more right, I need one of those programs where they do everything like give you perfect white teeth, nip and tuck here and there and then present you to your family and friends, I think it's the ten years younger program, boy I'd love to look 10 years younger, they'd have to heavily sedate me for the denistry bit though rofl but oh to be someone that Simon enjoys looking at again and who he'd be proud to show off, woot a dream come true. I wish I knew someone who knew someone that would make my dreams come true! I'm not vein, personally I'm used to this ugly fat old looking mug, but oh how Simon would love it, and the kids could show off their Mum again. If I look like this now just think what I'll look like in 10 years time! I don't want to think about that nightmare and I'm sure you won't either.

*shudders* Let's think about something nice now, at least nicer than that. Bronny has a trip with school to go to the Ironbridge Gorge and Museum as part of their learning in Geography. School want a "voluntary contribution" of £10.20 but they have it in bold that if they don't receive enough contributions the trip won't take place, this happened with another trip they went on and it got cancelled and then it was suddenly being funded by someone or other, so why don't they save themselves time and save pissing off the parents by getting it funded in the first place now that's 3 trips and nigh on £30 they want from parents of yr2 and yr5 children by the end of November. I know we're not the worst off family of the school and we're struggling to afford all these trips, never mind the worse off families, if we ARE the worst off family then I am shameful..

Euan was his ever angry pentup and scary (ye who reads knows that I am truly scared of my son and that I belive he is the most aggressive and angry of children that I have met) self today, I am surprised that his behaviour doesn't give him a headache, it would me lol I feel for Bronny most, I don't care if he hurts me emotionally and physically, it's how often he hurts Bronny in these ways that worries me, poor girl is a shrivelled up quivering wreck who is sobbing when he has finished with her, it's not Bronny's usual crying over everyting ways either she is genuinely crying because of him, it's just not fair and it has got to stop :'(

Today's Ramble 08.11.08

Well, Euan and Bronny arrived home around 9pm and were so knackered that they fell asleep the minute I put them in their beds and snuggled them down heheh bless their socks, their clothes were SOOO fucking filthy rofl bless, I will be lucky if I can get the mud out of their trousers, stupid me put Euan in his best trousers, I'm going to regret that! I should have planned ahead and got them both wellies! rofl I'll have to buy them both a smart outfit for the Christmas meal in December anyway which I don't know where or when it is yet... where doesn't make any difference to me, but when does obviously. Then there's another smart outfit to wear to Christina's on Christmas Day :)

Have seen the 200 games that is on the card with the DS's for Christmas for the kids, LOADS of decent games, everything that I have too lol which means that they won't have to nick my games WOOT. Oh one emphasis on DS, they have the DS and not the DS Lite, which is no problem with me, but I don't know whether it will be a problem with them, it shouldn't be because it's the same thing just in a different casing. I will explain it to the kids tomorrow anyway and show it to them so they don't complain that it is different to mine. I think that design is more suitable for kids anyway. I will show Charlene the link when she's on again so she can save some money on getting Sam's Christmas present.

I hope Charlene is OK she's not been online since she did her dailies Friday morning. I've not long sent her a text but if she's poorly she'll be in bed already and not sure if she keeps her phone on or not. Really worried now the more I think about it.

Simon's cockcroaches are making a fair bt of noise tonight. Still not sure that he was wise changing to cockroaches, Fwog doesn't seem overly keen on them not that I'm surprised, the damn things are armour plated lol I still hate them with a passion and refuse to look at them, Simon thinks that I'm daft, I think that I have my own mind and if I choose that they freak me out and I hate them then that's my perogative!

The fireworks were particularly loud and there were lots of them tonight, but then it is the nearest Saturday to bonfire night. If I can remember I am going to google tomorrow about who "invented" bonfire night and when. I can't even remember when Guy Falkes tried to blow up the houses of parliament, not that I blame him rofl!

Tis rather windy tonight! It's blowing a gale! I'd be worried about the rabbits if I didn't know that their run was screwed down to the decking and the decking ain't going nowhere! heheh

Ears are ringing again and I have a gale blowing through them, so annoying, always worse when Im more tired than my usual state of tired.

I've been rather poorly and in need of sleep today more than usual, got up round about 10:30 today which is good for me, simon woke me up by getting stuff ready to have his shower so I gave up with trying to go back to sleep and got up.

eeek ni ni

My nose my nose

My nose has been playing up all day today and all day yesterday, it keeps creating thick sticky mucus which runs down the back of my throat and makes me want to throw up :( it's not a cold because it's only one side and it only ever goes down the back of my throat even if my head is tilted slightly forward, it's horrible but I can't blow my nose to get it out it just keeps trickling down to my throat and it is so disgusting, I often choke on it at night when I'm sleeping if it tries to go the wrong way.

What could be causing it I wonder?

Bleugh

Sorry for this disgusting blog.

Bye bye!

Arggghhhhh heheh

My flippin kids have done my nut all day today, because I've not let them play on my ds or my pc today they've been bored bored bored and because they've been bored they have played up, Euan mostly, obviously, which is no surprise really.

They've gone with Emma now though which is a relief, I think I'll go for keeping the peace tomorrow and let them go on my PC and DS.

Fireworks are loud! eeek

Today's Ramble 07.11.08

lol Simon is trying to get comfy on his new pillows he refused to believe me when I said that 4 pillows would be to many to sleep on but he still chose a pack of 4 lol, he is now using one to protect him from the bed springs and 3 to sleep on. My pillows aren't too bad I guess but they could be better. They just don't make them as well as they used to, the material is just too soft, it's like toy stuffing, the white fluffy stuff I mean. I think I'd be better spending a bit of money and going for some better quality pillows from Dunelm or something and giving these two pillows to Bronny. Euan desperately needs a new pillow too though his is actually damp (as in smelly damp not slightly moist) from him sweating so much, I never actually noticed before.

Emma is taking the kids to the bonfire night at the castle grounds tomorrow, there will be a fairground there too and they usually put on quite a good firework display, I wouldn't mind going actually but it will be far too busy for the wheelchair. and I'll just get in the way of everyone, and it'll be cold and that won't do me any good at all lol. I know what you're thinking "well it's OK for you to send your two kids out in the cold" but it's different, they will be so well wrapped up you'd never recognise them and they're usually warmer at those kind of things anyway, they haven't got a suppressed immune system anyway. Besides what Mum would begrudge her kids a trip to the fair lol

I'm getting the feeling that Emma has changed her mind about tomorrow though, I don't know why I just am.

I still have to find out what games come with the DS's that Em has bought the kids for Xmas so we know which ones we are buying them. I have a few ideas for presents for the kids but nothing is going to be as good as their DS's :S they deserve them though bless their souls, their life has been made crap by me :( bless them.

I've just thought of a cool invention for the car for travelling kids, one of those comfy trays with a beany bag underneath with fold out pockets or maybe pull out drawers either side for crayons and/or pens with a clipboard style paper holder, Would have to draw it but I think it will be ideal for a long journey... hmmm yeah, now how do I get a prototype made to show to crayola? rofl! joking aside I think it would sell really well, shame I don't have the ability to make a prototype lol. I'm so sad.

I upset Jane tonight, I didn't meant to but I did :( I was talkin to her and then I upchucked so had to clean that up, then
I came back to talk to Jane and she had gone :( I can't say I blame her I would be a bit annoyed too I think. I pm'd her to apologise and mainly to explain but I think she signed out for the night after she sent me the first reply. I hope that it can be resolved because I loves my Janeypoo to bits.

We went to Big D today and bought the pillows, some cat litter some more first aid items and crippies and five containers for Simon.

I am going to have a hamm sandwich in a minute, they are doing my nut! rofl they're racing around scritching and scratching tossing and turning you wouldn't believe the noise they're making lol

I'm in agony in this position now so am off to sleep, well have been drifting in and out of sleep for about 4 hours now rofl, tis now 4am rofl.

nite nite

Today's ramble 06.11.08

I cant... believe... how ... slow... today has gone! geesh I could have dragged myself to the Dell company and collected a laptop quicker than today has gone! rofl

I didn't get to have my "normal sleep" this afternoon because just as I was snuggled down and half asleep there was a phonecall that I decided that I had to answer (I normally try to ignore it when I'm in bed) and luckily enough that I did answer as it was school requesting that someone goes to school and looks at Euan and decides whether he should come home with them or not because he had a bit of a run in with someone in the playground, they ran into each other and fell flat on their backs, Euan hit his head on the concrete floor she said he'd got a bump on it. She wasn't lying! In fact that was really underestimated. The bump is 5cm in diameter and raised by 2cm off his head and grazed, I've never seen a lump so big though, seriously I haven't.

I'm getting him in with the doctors tomorrow morning because I am NOT happy about the size of the bump, it might be nothing because hits to the head can be utterly deceiving, but I guess we're lucky that the swelling from the hit came OUT and not forced it's way IN, that would be a problem and I think he'd have attended hospital via ambulance if that had happened. With the head being so thin between skin and bone, when an abrasion occurs, it can only come outwards and not inwards (unless the skull is fractured too) so it always looks worse than it is, but I'm still not happy with the pure size of this bump, it's well and truly HUGE.

Euan often has blows to the head due to the nature of him playing, he is very rough and full on and sometimes aggressive and is always falling over and stuff, I've seen some golf balls on his head in my time, but nothing quite as pronounced and big.

*stops talking about it*

Geesh, I didn't realise what time it was :O I think I'm going to quickly jot this down, check on Euan, make a cuppa and then get my ass in bed and then decide if I'm going to add some more, I should really as it's just been about Euan's noggin rofl.

Laters.

Well Euan seems OK in himself but it doesn't mean that he hasn't got a cracked skull or something, his behaviour and getting him up after he's gone to bed etc is all about having damage to the brain. I think to be on the safe side I am going to get Euan in with the doctors in the morning, unless his head bump has gone down significantly by morning.

geesh this blog entry is taking some time to type lol it's now 12:40 heheh

I had a right cropper of a headache earlier, it was cured by meds but I didn't think it could be it was because I had settled in a horrible position then I finally drifted off and regretted it when I woke up, it started off as a stiff neck and shoulders and quickly moved up to my head, I took co-codamol which eased the bad head but nothing else I would have taken extra tramdol but I'm pretty spaced out as it is, without being worse. lol

Gonna go out to Big D tomorrow depending on if/when Euan is at the doctors. I want to get some new pillows for Simon and I and a new single quilt for Bronny instead of the sleeping bag. :) Need to look at the price of that memory foam topper that Simon keeps going on about. Need to order my laptop first thing though wooot!

Arrrrgggghhhhh you'd think that it was me that hit my head today, that cropper of a headache is back with a vengeance. :(
I'll get some more meds down me I s'pose.

I think I had better go!

morning ramble 06.11.08

Good Morning UK! rofl

Delivery arrived first thing this morning, any later and Simon wouldn't have been here, it came before he took the children to school, 8:30!! that's early for a delivery heheh

Mealies are HORRIBLE! ewwwwww lol they try to wriggle out of my fingers and they are really quite strong! :S Oscar likes mealies :) heheheh he played with it for a while and then killed it and ate it (yes I know that's cruel but still) and the rats, my God do they love mealies! rofl, they'd have eaten the whole tub full I think! lol

I have to find out whether the mealies are just a treat though, I know they're not very nutricious, so it tells me that there's mostly fat or something in them, there's got to be some protein because they are a creature and meat of sorts... hmmm

I will try hammies with a mealie when I clean them out, will see if they like them or not, oh I dropped one on the floor when I was feeding them to the critters and boy did it wriggle away fast! I thought I was going to lose it it was wriggling that fast lol

I've scanned the school photo in to show Dad & Mum and other people, I'm going to put a copy up on the forum too in fact I might put a copy here for you all to see, hold on....

There we go :) done :) ^ what do you think? :)

I am so proud of my beautiful children ;) I know every Mother is proud of her children but still. ;)

Waiting for the shopping to arrive... mmmm satsumas rofl hopefully there will not be anything out of stock, I bloody hate that, it's usually the thing I wanted the most or that we needed the most, Simon's pizza's have been out of stock quite a few times, that's two meals I have to find for him to eat when that happens :S oh well, such is life.

My lips are as rough as old boots again, I'm picking at the crappy skin to get down to new skin (another habit I have that I should quit) and unfortunately sometimes I slip and pull too much skin off and end up with bloody and then scabby lips which looks and feels far worse than old boots. rofl

My KPK order still hasn't come through, going to have to email her and query that because I would have thought I would have received it by now :S I'll be pissed if that has been lost in the post too! grrrr I can't believe that Grindey's sent a cheque through the post without even getting recorded mail, I mean what would they do if it went missing? How bloody long would it take for me to prove that I'd not received the cheque, also there's the fact that someone else might cash it on my behalf too eeek, then I'd have to prove that it didn't go into my bank, or they would have to, and I bet they'd drag their heels on that one and it would have taken til after Christmas to get it *breathes* at least I DID get it and it's safely paid in waiting to clear.

My Secret Santa order hasn't arrived yet either, I presume/hope that will come tomorrow, the person said they would try and post it yesterday, perhaps they didn't get to. I am REALLY looking forward to sending that to my Secret santa partner I really am woot :D lol

oops slipped, now I'm bleeding :S brb

Shopping now here, eaten a custard cream, a coconut macaroon and a satsuma for my lunch, not too healthy but I don't intend on eating much today anyway so there we go. I'm going to have to go to bed now because my body is saying it's had enough of sitting upright eeek

See you all laters.


Ni.

x

Today's ramble 05.11.08

Well what a day to be wasted, I was so poorly though so I just had to go back to bed, I forced myself to stay up this morning so I didn't waste today like I did yesterday where I was asleep from about 10:30am.

Today still went slow because I am waiting for Friday so that I can order my laptop heheh I hope that the delivery is really good and I get it sometime next week, even if I have to add £10 to it or £20 it will be worth it to get it sooner, I would not pay more than that though I would be stupid if I did.

Oooh I want Friday to hurry up and be here, I wish Friday was tomorrow and not the day after rofl though, you never know the cheque might clear early and be ready tomorrow (wishful thinking rofl

Well I'm going to finish this in bed because I'm in too much pain to sit at the desk any more....

In on DS

I'm hoping that my delivery arrives tomorrow of hemcore, rabbit food, dog food and mealies :) I'm not sure how I'll cope with feeding my omnivores the mealies, I'm a bit nervous actually, I mean, how wriggly are they? rofl

Hmmm, Euan wouldn't go to bed tonight, it was excuse after excuse after excuse, when he realised that Bron was having half hour to play on my DS until bed, whilst Euan was in bed that was it, he wanted up, and though of every excuse he could think of to stay up until Bronny went to bed :( I've GOT to get more strict and get them in bed, on time and stop them from coming back out! Euan goes at 7:30, Bronny at 8, simple as that!

I'm tired, really tired tonight, more tired than the last few days.

Ni Ni.

x

Oh dear me...

I am so addicted to blogging that this blod was originally WRITTEN on paper and then typed up because Bronny has stolen my PC and Euan has stolen my DS so I have no blogging implement so instead of trying to think of someone to write a letter to I decided to write a blog instead :D sad aren't I? rofl

Euan is playing the new Crayola game and to be honest I think the game could be completed in one night *rolls eyes* it perhaps wasn't worth the money that I paid for it, especially as you can't delete progress and start again, so at the end of the game we'll have a rather expensive colouring book. :S Would be nice to colour in lots of pictures, I would say that it's a shame it doesn't save them, but then the colouring book would be finished too lol

It didn't take them long to swap over. Euan is now playing a game called Sky Rockets to the Rescue rofl Bloody heck that was a big firework bang, they get louder every year. Oscar is not remotely phased by them, he's fast asleep at the end of the bed lol.

I'm hoping that my Lovell pets order will arrive tomorrow as we're seriously getting low on hemcore, their food is diminishing quickly too which reminds me again of the need to get more cereal and pasta on the shopping list tonight to be delivered tomorrow.

"Baby" ratties require more protein than their older friendies but it won't hurt the oldies to have the extra protein at least I believe it won't. I can't believe how quickly the ratties grow up. They're not THAt much smaller than my three camelot boys, heheh my alphabet boys A, B, C, D & E. I won't be getting anymore all though the temptation is there, I want to open up the cage to them all eventually when I have enough hammocks and houses and stuff.

Well that's it the Crayola game is finished, now we do have a very expensive colouring book *rolls eyes* though it might be nice to relaz and colour in a picture without having to throw away the paper later when it's old and past it.

Simon's on his PC too now, so all we need is my laptop then we can be on various devices and do stuff at the same time lol my laptop will be mine and no-one else's though the only other person that will go on it is Simon and that's only if he's been a good boy rofl.

You know I am surprised that Simon hasn't requested an invite for my blog so he can check whether I am slagging him off or not, I would never slag him off anyway, complain about him yes, but not slag him off, he's my number one, one and only Simon, bless him, he really is my star, my soulmate and everything else combined, I loves my Simon very very muchly.

Euan is waiting for a game which is taking forever to load so he is half asleep leaning on my chair watching Simon whilst waiting for a game to load, it's near their bedtime anyway so I'm going to "sign out now".

And Yes, I did write all this up on paper before typing it up to my blog. All four a5 pages of it (2 pages 2 x sides)

ni ni a bit

Ramble of today 04.11.08

Well, I emailed Lovell's and enquired about when my order was going to be processed and I got a very short and sweet "order is wih DHL they take up to 48 hours to deliver, Thanks Kris Lovell" no explanation of why it has taken 10 days up til today and no apology either. I wouldn't use them again but their prices are so good and they stock hemp at £7.65 for the huge bale that lasts months. :S

I just need to get some more pasta and more cereal in to make up the mix. I'm thinking of moving the hamsters onto the shunamite mix as they have gone off their hamster food *rolls eyes* they're eating hardly any of it at the moment, it really worries me when they leave it, but I don't know what to offer them instead, will have to talk to Jane about them tomorrow, hopefully Jane will read this tomorrow and will remind me that I need to talk with her about it.

I'm going to be looking forward to the post over the next few days because I have allsorts that should be arriving, my houses from KPK, another DS game and the present for my Secret Santa partner should be arriving.

woot I'm so excited I want to send the gift now! lol, I'm going to wrap the gift put it in a box and then wrap the box too lol I probably shouldn't have said anything but hey they can't read this anyway :) Not going to say what I've got the person anyway as Janeypoo will tell me off lol.

I wonder which poor soul has me? poor soul that they are they should just send me an empty matchbox, I wants a matchbox I does. I used to love little boxes as a kid, I'd make them into beds either for toys or for my imaginary friends which were tiny little people who stood no bigger than my little finger. heheh

I loved most things about being a kid, some days me, Clare and Dave would all play together, other days it'd be just me and Clare, or just me and Dave, other days, most days I'd be on my own, playing my own games which was better most of the time anyway. whenever we'd fight it'd be me in the middle or on my own against them two, was never on anyone's side, always on my own, then it got more often, I was the fat kid, the smelly kid, the adopted kid. I wasn't adopted but they bullied me with that right up until I left home, and still they'd joke about it after and did every time I saw them I was either fat or adopted or both. It hurt, it stung as the tears welled in my eyes that I promised I would never shed, the lump in my throat as I held back the hurt felt so much like a rock that was stuck, right there in the back of my mouth.

Every time I left that house I vowed I'd never go back, I promised myself that I'd stay away and just see, just to see if they would notice that I wasn't there, but every stupid week I'd spend 2-1/2 hours travelling to get there, and every time it was time to come home he'd have a go at me in the car, tell me I was stupid cow for going. He didn't actually care about me it was an excuse to have a go about my parents, they were not good enough for him.

I think the day that I got hurt the most was the day that Mum said they were not going to pay a penny towards my wedding if/when I get married, those few words ripped through my heart and proved to me that I am nothing to them, not even worthy of a tradition. I don't know whether it is because I left him, or what their reason behind cutting me off like that, she could NEVER understand how much those words hurt me that day, those who know me well will know it's not about money, it's the tradition, the one thing every parent gets involved in for their daughter. Maybe I am adopted, it sure as hell feels like it.

She phones to see how I am and then she swiftly goes into monologue about how she is, about how Clare is, how fantastic Amy and Joe are, about how much of a genius Olivia is about how she is already equivalent of the year above her. I feel like asking her not to bother phoning.

She's over in Germany again for a month, she text me to ask how we all are and to see how Euan got on with Social Worker. I haven't text back yet because I can't be arsed. It costs HER money when I send texts whilst she's in Germany and to explain the SW visit and everything it entails would use up at least four texts, she's probably already spent a fortune of Dad's money as it is *rolls eyes*

She's 55 this year and she does text speak and thinks she's really with it, when I show her texts to Simon he just laughs.

I've not checked up on Dad yet to see how he is, usually he copes pretty nicely without Mum, there's no point texting him to see how he is because he just doesn't do texts. Not to me anyway. Probably does to his 'little princess' but that's another matter.

Didn't see Charlene on tonight when I was on but she often comes on later anyway. Bless her heart, her favourite hamster in the whole world died today, she must feel bloody rotten a lot of her little'uns have gone to the bridge recently, it must be hard to stay positive and look to the future.

I can hear my little pompom's in the foodbowl again, maybe they're searching for something in particular.....

Rabbits are weather proofed for another winter thanks to Si, I really miss going out and feeding them, having them fight my hand as I stocked up their foodbowl, trying to pull it away from me to start scoffing before I've even finished, they're right lazy buggers too, hardly ever see them chasing each other around, it's funny when they do though, Theo will chase Jasmin around, then Jasmin will take over and chase Theo lol

Just thinking of the huge shopping list I have to write for tomorrow, why is it that we run out of everything big and expensive at the same time?

Got to remember kitchen roll, you dont realise how many uses it has and how utterly usefull it is until you run out of it *puts huge amount of kitchen roll on shopping order*. lol

We are still finding places where there is a small puddle of water, there was quite a big one underneath the TV stand unit thingy, not sure WHY it reminded me but we haven't checked under the rat cage yet, nor under the fridge. *on list of things to do tomorrow* whilst we have the rat cage out I can retrieve items from under the stairs that we desperately need like my wheelchair pump for one heheh there's also a few other bits in there that we are going to need. I wonder if I should see if any fish tank water has gotten in there? That's all the Christmas lights buggered if it has :( will calm down and wait and see tomorrow I've gotta get it all out at some point to put the decs up anyway, the only place it can go is in the window lol That'll be fun trying to open and close the curtains every morning/night lol

I'm quite looking forward to Christmas this year because it will be the first year that we know we've not got to move anywhere else after Christmas and it'll be the first Christmas that we can remotely afford it. The Newberry family meal is on too, which is something I used to look forward to every year. I'm really looking forward to it, Simon's Uncle Chris sat next to me at the last two family do's because he wanted to talk to me regarding my health and his own. Wonder if he will opt to do that again.

We're at Simon's parents for Christmas Day and then my parent's on Boxing Day. I love Christmas Day at Christina's house it's all so very special and warm and Christina works so hard and makes a fantastic feast fit for a King on Christmas Day and it's all brilliant and magical and Christmas :) I hope it snows this year. I can't believe that last bout only lasted a day, the frost preserved a lot of it and then it was gone.

Ramble 03.11.08

Slacking I am, usually I would have created more blogs than this, going to have to start being a good girl again heheh. I have read everyone's blogs over the past few days and it seems though I upset Clarebear when I was talking about friends, to be honest I shouldn't have said anything about anyone, but there you go I ballsed up again. I love Clarebear to bits I didn't refer to her as good I referred to her as great and fantastic, person and friend.

As for Janeypoo I said the least about her because I couldn't find enough stupendous words that would really hit the spot, Jane is, and will always be my true bestest friend on the internet, she is everything I could possibly ask for from a best friend. I know we don't really talk that much anymore, I'd love to be able to start mucking around with her more, like the true child that I am lol perhaps she might like that, or maybe she will think I'm just saying that.

I hope that no-one gets offended by what I have said about them. Or if I've not mentioned them today it doesn't mean I love them any less, it's just that they are just perfick as they are ;)

Euan's ben10 game arrived today, which is pretty cool, I had quite a play on it lol it can be quite addictive. I hope that the crayola game arrives in the post today as I'm really looking forward to playing on it.

Talking of deliveries, my order to Lovell's still hasn't arrived, nor have I been given any indication that it will arrive, I placed that order WEEKS ago! grrrrr I think I recall them taking forever to order my stuff before. If I don't have an email in my inbox today that they are coming, I shall email them and see what is taking them so long.

Forum has been average over the past few days, I think that it has a lot to do with my lack of attendance at the moment. When I'm on properly I respond to a lot of posts which gives other people something to respond to. Something like that anyway, unless it's a case of "if she cba, neither can I" lol

Simon is laughing at something on the TV I'm wondering if he's laughing at something that was supposed to be funny or whether it was a take the piss laugh.

Charlene seems to have a lot on her plate at the moment bless her, she never complains though, she always laughs about it and asks me how my day is bless her socks. That's one of the amazing things about Charlen that makes her so lovable heheh. Forumwise she's always letting me know about things that need doing so I can get them done, she's a real right hand woman is our Charlene. She would make a fantastic moderator but we already have enough on board that we do. At least if it gets really busy again and we need another mod, I know where to go.

EDIT ON TUESDAY AFTERNOON....

Simon has been pissing about all morning trying to get the stand to the fish tank absolutely level so that there is no problem when the heavy tank is filled with even heavier water, this is what happened to Simon's other set up, plus it already had various dodgy chips in it, I should have known that it would collapse at that exact point from learning about that sort of thing at the Hollybush, the many times a member of staff would stop and talk to me when I only went in for some fish lol Hopefully the new one will be better quality. If it isn't I am not going to allow him to fill it with water at all!

I've not actually seen Simon all day I have just realised, he came up about 2pm and I've still not really spoken to him because he was busy feeding all of his spideys. I wonder if any of his spideys have spidey senses and break out of their containers at night to save the residents of the insect world?

If I had spidey senses I'd fight crime and no-one would get away with anything. Have you noticed that Superman is the only superhero that protects the world, all the others just protect their resident cities. Lazy buggers lol

Goodnight blogthing

x

Ramble 02.11.08

Geesh I'm monged earlier than usual tonight... perhaps it's because I took two lots of tablets at 8:30 because I'd forgotten my dinner tablets, so I took my dinner ones and bed ones at the same time, I didn't actually think that they would take affect/effect (?) until later on though, but I guess it is nearly bed time, especially as I have to be up earlier in the morning than my usual 12pm holiday getting up time.

Looks like I'm here for a while though as Simon has just started watching Lee Evans :) Lee Evans is brilliant he is amazingly funny all the time and so hyperactive and talks so quick and gets so excitable, I love his nervous laugh heheh

*Now on DS*

well that lasted for all of five minutes *rolls eyes* when Si decides it's time for bed that's it, it's time for bed lol we're going to go and pay the cheque in tomorrow hopefully it'll clear really quickly so that I can get lappy ordered :) I know exactly which one I want so I just have to wait for pennies,

I'm buying Si his new fish tank at £150 too :) so that will be my pennies taken then I'll just have the money that we owe the landlord.

It'll be a big relief to pay that debt in one go, wll mean we still owe him a tiny bit but we'll pay for that + monthly rent I'm sure the landlord wouldn't mind I think s long as he gets his money eventually that's all that matters. That is how he works.

Am tired now, goin ni ni

Tomorrow...

Little bit of a ramble 01.11.08

I'm not sure where to start today.

Got up earlier than planned this morning because my delightful children woke me up so much that I could sleep in no more, I think it was about 10:00am. I was contemplating going back to bed when Simon called up for my help, I was just putting my slippers on when he yelled at Bronny to get me NOW immediately and all that...

Turns out that the 97 gallon tank that Simon has set up and had water in for ages, decides that it doesn't like how it is supported any more and cracks and allows the entire liquid content of the tank to gush out. I'm presuming that Oscar was under it eating his biscuits at the time as he was pretty wet and upset when Si opened the door.

Simon found a puddle of water in the hall first and thought that there was only one place that could have come from and that is his new 97gallon bomb.. and yes, it had erupted all over the floor.

I feel sorry for him because he's lost his fishies and his tank is broken (bottom needs replacing) BUT I'm a bit upset that he seems to think that as we cannot SEE the water it is no longer a problem, I am sure that his phrase is going to come back and bite him in the butt.. but we will see, I'll leave it and keep quiet, you can bet a pound to a penny though, that we'll be replacing the floor before Christmas or AT Christmas :S As long as it's covered by the insurance because I know for a fact that I cannot afford to replace the floor and I'm NOT asking my Gramps to lend us the money for it, I'm not borrowing a penny off him ever again, no I not.

I do understand about his dead fishies though, honestly I do, but dead fishies are nothing if we get kicked out of here for damaging the whole of downstairs flooring :S and not going about it properly, like reporting it to him, or going through the insurers. I guess if the floor starts to come up we could act thick and say that we thought it wasn't a problem because it was gone?

Same as usual for rest of the day, fed the kids and lay on the bed whilst Euan played on my PC and Bronwyn on my DS whilst I rested and finally was able to get off to sleep woot! I don't know if my sleep was deep or not, but it was worth it for those few hours, although I woke up feeling like I'd not slept. It's horrible is this sleep problem, I used to love my sleep, I'd get a good 10 - 11 hours of sleep and feel so refreshed in the morning and be able to get up without a worry. Oh if only.

x