Hello fans.
How are we all this evening, hope everyone is well :) heheh I sound like I've got a real fanbase, I wish, in fact I don't think I do want to be that famous actually, I would have to really worry about what I say then.
I am sorry to anyone that I upset or offended or shocked with my note on FaceBook, not only did it get me a response from Caroline, my sister-in-law, who was merely protecting her husband it also got me a rollocking from my Dad, which really broke my heart, I've not been told off by my Dad since I lived at home and it really affected me, I try very hard to make him proud of me and then I go and do something stupid like that so he is disgusted in me :(
I can't help it, I can honestly blame it on my state of mind due to being poorly, either that or being drugged up most of the time, I just do not think about my actions a lot of the time, every action has a reaction and I don't think about that moreso.
I have just seen a picture of my two cousins on Facebook and it looks like they joined in on some fundraising expedition, perhaps the fantastic carnival that they have in Polesworth every year? Anyway, it's made me even more determined to go and see them at some point so that I can give them a big hug, I miss my Aunty Teresa too, I was her favourite niece at some point not sure if I still am now considering I haven't seen her in years.
Oscar has his eye on Rex (our new chameleon), well he did until he noticed a cricket on the screen and when he went for that Simon shooed him away so we could ensure that it's not one of the escaped ones, yes we have escaped ones 3 or 4 I think, running around in our bedroom, hopefully they will die before they actually get too big heheh, I sound really calm about it, to be honest there's no point rollocking him about it, he can't do anything about them being on the loose so there's no point complaining about it.
Ooo I've been quit smoking for 2 years and 4 months now. To be absolutely honest I think if I wasn't so poorly and not on oxygen I would probably have not succeeded in quitting, I would probably be still smoking now, though who'd say that my breathing would be any worse? lol charming, I quit smoking in the October and then end up on Oxygen in the January, what does that tell you about quitting? heheh
I think I upset my Mum with the comments I made on facebook to be honest but if everyone didn't treat me as if I was faking it, I wouldn't have needed to write that note.
Hold on a minute, maybe it's me that's the problem, maybe it's my paranoia that I KNOW I have causing the problem, maybe everyon does believe me and is behind me but it's just my stupid mind that makes me think that they don't believe me. Perhaps I should just shut up and stop being so selfish and me me me and I would find that my family do give a monkey's bottom.
Though, I'm not selfish and me me me at all so i don't understand, it HAS to be my mind set and my drugged state which is making me so highly paranoid. I've always fought for the support from my family and I've always felt that I have to work at things and still they are not proud of me, but perhaps if they said once in a while that they are proud of me if they are I would find life a lot easier.
It has to be all me, how could my whole family be against me when all I have done is be poorly. No-one has offered their assistance EVER though, if my daughter was poorly I'd make sure I invited the family for dinner at LEAST one night each week so that she didn't have to cook every night. I know that Mum isn't exactly 100% herself but you'd think knowing first hand what it feels like to not be able to move without wanting to scream out in pain that she would be a tad more supportive. They invite Caroline and Dave regularly so why can't they invite us? I guess we'll get invited to more places when the children are older and better behaved. Euan causes us a problem wherever we go at the moment, people are reluctant for us to go to their houses because they know he'll kick up a stink at the end of the night.
I might invite Mum and Dad over this weekend actually, unless it's too late notice, probably would be, there's no point inviting Simon's family any more. If Simon had TOLD me that his Mum said if he got a snake she would never come to the house again, then when he asked me if I had any problem with him getting a snake I'd have said, "hey hold on a minute, do you want to never see your Mum under this roof again?" but no, he told me AFTER he got the snake. Typical man, he knew that if he had told me that prior to purchase I would have said no way lol.
I have a beautiful Oscar puddy cat sitting at my feet, he's watching the hamsters from afar, he's been banned off my desk for the night because he keeps walking around to the chameleon and pestering him. *rolls eyes* He is also watching Simon's torch. It's really funny watching him watch the hamsters with his big big black eyes (it's dark ish in here) and then swiftly moving his head to watch the torch light he is so attentive is our puss.
I'm scared now. You know when you're really tired as a passenger in the car and you get home and then you realise you can't remember HOW you got home? Like which route was taken or something because you just didn't keep attentive? (I've done that driving before it's bloody scary to think WHAT I was doing during the time that I can't remember?) anyway have you ever had a time where you realise you cannot remember a bit of time? Well, I was watching Simon spraying his frog, he then asked me if I wanted to have a look at her whilst she was in the water. Next minute he was putting his pc on. I asked him what he was doing as it's the time we normally go to bed, not start to do something? He said that he was going to import the pictures. I asked him what pictures. He had taken loads of pictures of the frog between spraying and asking me if I wanted to have a look. So the time it took him to take the pictures is a complete gone, I didn't witness him doing it at all. It's not as if I was just getting into typing this, I didn't see the flashes that would be required at this time of night? I have lost a fair few minutes of my life. It makes me wonder how many times it has happened to me in the past. I know it's happened at least twice now because I remember driving home from a party (Ann Summers so not drunk) and I got home and then realised that I didn't know which way I had actually driven home. then obviously there was what just happened. eeek
Hhhmmmm I'm not sure whether there is anything else to write tonight, so I'm going to bog off now and leave it as that.
Ni ni peeps
x
How are we all this evening, hope everyone is well :) heheh I sound like I've got a real fanbase, I wish, in fact I don't think I do want to be that famous actually, I would have to really worry about what I say then.
I am sorry to anyone that I upset or offended or shocked with my note on FaceBook, not only did it get me a response from Caroline, my sister-in-law, who was merely protecting her husband it also got me a rollocking from my Dad, which really broke my heart, I've not been told off by my Dad since I lived at home and it really affected me, I try very hard to make him proud of me and then I go and do something stupid like that so he is disgusted in me :(
I can't help it, I can honestly blame it on my state of mind due to being poorly, either that or being drugged up most of the time, I just do not think about my actions a lot of the time, every action has a reaction and I don't think about that moreso.
I have just seen a picture of my two cousins on Facebook and it looks like they joined in on some fundraising expedition, perhaps the fantastic carnival that they have in Polesworth every year? Anyway, it's made me even more determined to go and see them at some point so that I can give them a big hug, I miss my Aunty Teresa too, I was her favourite niece at some point not sure if I still am now considering I haven't seen her in years.
Oscar has his eye on Rex (our new chameleon), well he did until he noticed a cricket on the screen and when he went for that Simon shooed him away so we could ensure that it's not one of the escaped ones, yes we have escaped ones 3 or 4 I think, running around in our bedroom, hopefully they will die before they actually get too big heheh, I sound really calm about it, to be honest there's no point rollocking him about it, he can't do anything about them being on the loose so there's no point complaining about it.
Ooo I've been quit smoking for 2 years and 4 months now. To be absolutely honest I think if I wasn't so poorly and not on oxygen I would probably have not succeeded in quitting, I would probably be still smoking now, though who'd say that my breathing would be any worse? lol charming, I quit smoking in the October and then end up on Oxygen in the January, what does that tell you about quitting? heheh
I think I upset my Mum with the comments I made on facebook to be honest but if everyone didn't treat me as if I was faking it, I wouldn't have needed to write that note.
Hold on a minute, maybe it's me that's the problem, maybe it's my paranoia that I KNOW I have causing the problem, maybe everyon does believe me and is behind me but it's just my stupid mind that makes me think that they don't believe me. Perhaps I should just shut up and stop being so selfish and me me me and I would find that my family do give a monkey's bottom.
Though, I'm not selfish and me me me at all so i don't understand, it HAS to be my mind set and my drugged state which is making me so highly paranoid. I've always fought for the support from my family and I've always felt that I have to work at things and still they are not proud of me, but perhaps if they said once in a while that they are proud of me if they are I would find life a lot easier.
It has to be all me, how could my whole family be against me when all I have done is be poorly. No-one has offered their assistance EVER though, if my daughter was poorly I'd make sure I invited the family for dinner at LEAST one night each week so that she didn't have to cook every night. I know that Mum isn't exactly 100% herself but you'd think knowing first hand what it feels like to not be able to move without wanting to scream out in pain that she would be a tad more supportive. They invite Caroline and Dave regularly so why can't they invite us? I guess we'll get invited to more places when the children are older and better behaved. Euan causes us a problem wherever we go at the moment, people are reluctant for us to go to their houses because they know he'll kick up a stink at the end of the night.
I might invite Mum and Dad over this weekend actually, unless it's too late notice, probably would be, there's no point inviting Simon's family any more. If Simon had TOLD me that his Mum said if he got a snake she would never come to the house again, then when he asked me if I had any problem with him getting a snake I'd have said, "hey hold on a minute, do you want to never see your Mum under this roof again?" but no, he told me AFTER he got the snake. Typical man, he knew that if he had told me that prior to purchase I would have said no way lol.
I have a beautiful Oscar puddy cat sitting at my feet, he's watching the hamsters from afar, he's been banned off my desk for the night because he keeps walking around to the chameleon and pestering him. *rolls eyes* He is also watching Simon's torch. It's really funny watching him watch the hamsters with his big big black eyes (it's dark ish in here) and then swiftly moving his head to watch the torch light he is so attentive is our puss.
I'm scared now. You know when you're really tired as a passenger in the car and you get home and then you realise you can't remember HOW you got home? Like which route was taken or something because you just didn't keep attentive? (I've done that driving before it's bloody scary to think WHAT I was doing during the time that I can't remember?) anyway have you ever had a time where you realise you cannot remember a bit of time? Well, I was watching Simon spraying his frog, he then asked me if I wanted to have a look at her whilst she was in the water. Next minute he was putting his pc on. I asked him what he was doing as it's the time we normally go to bed, not start to do something? He said that he was going to import the pictures. I asked him what pictures. He had taken loads of pictures of the frog between spraying and asking me if I wanted to have a look. So the time it took him to take the pictures is a complete gone, I didn't witness him doing it at all. It's not as if I was just getting into typing this, I didn't see the flashes that would be required at this time of night? I have lost a fair few minutes of my life. It makes me wonder how many times it has happened to me in the past. I know it's happened at least twice now because I remember driving home from a party (Ann Summers so not drunk) and I got home and then realised that I didn't know which way I had actually driven home. then obviously there was what just happened. eeek
Hhhmmmm I'm not sure whether there is anything else to write tonight, so I'm going to bog off now and leave it as that.
Ni ni peeps
x
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